Why Can't I Wait?

"Don't ever wait on no nigga."

"Don't waste your time waiting on some man to be with you."

"If he wanted to be with you, you wouldn't have to wait."

"Why slow yourself down to wait on a man to get his shit together?"

"Never make someone a priority, and settle for them making you an option."

Sound familiar? These are all statements and questions that I have heard numerous times from friends, family, and just in group discussion. Time is limited, time is precious, time is never a given. Who wants to ever waste their time on something that's not worth it? Wasting time could mean patiently waiting, impatiently waiting, saving yourself, putting in tangible effort with no reward, etc. Wasting time could mean exposing feeling and emotion and not feeling that those are being reciprocated.

So, I ask you fellow bloggers...what's the damn rush? Why does waiting for a relationship or waiting for love, equate to wasting your time? Why isn't OK to wait for someone to be ready for you and what you will provide? Disclaimer: there ARE situations in which you may be wasting your time. there ARE situations in which you are waiting for something/someone that is not coming. there ARE situations in which it would be best to move on.

Personally, I'd prefer to wait for something I know is real. I'll wait for someone to be in the place that they feel they need to be, in order to be with me. That shows that he's not only taking care of himself, but that's invested in making this a good relationship, and has realized what he is and is not ready for at the time. I don't take "waiting" as something to mean that hes disinterested, or the "player" type, or not good enough to be with me. This also does not mean that I am lowering my standards in order to cater to someone else's needs. I respect when someone either shows me or tells me that they are not looking for the same things that I am at this moment.

So, currently, I'm waiting. Waiting on a good thing, waiting for the best thing. Love between two people is never something that should be rushed because we're on some clock of relationship accomplishments and aspirations. Love should be something that each party is whole-heartedly invested in, at the time that each party is ready and willing to partake in it. So I'm waiting for situations to alter and for roles to adjust. And I'm fine with that. And, so what, say he's not the man I'm going to marry. The experience thus far, and the experiences we'll have in the future, are not ones that I regret, or will ever forget. I will wait for him now, because being with someone else will not be fair to them or to me. I will wait for my emotions to be in check. I will wait for my priorities to be in check. I will wait to be back to myself again before I choose to engage with someone else.

I'm fine with not dating anyone, and stating that I'm not dating because I'm currently interested in someone. Why should I be embarrassed to say that I'm into someone? How many times have you been interested in someone that may not be interested in you in the same capacity? It happens and it's a part of life. I'd rather be honest than trying to prove to myself that I'm date-worthy or lovable, or jump into something I know isn't right, but that I'm about to try to MAKE right cuz now's the time to be in love with someone. So yes y'all, I'm single and interested. Or, single and waiting for someone. However you want to look at it.

My time, my love, my commitment to someone are not things that can be rushed. Not now, not ever.