Parental vs. Rude...When Does it Become NOT OK?

Now, my parents are Guyanese, and with all that West Indian history, comes a whole lotta nonsense that only few of my friends understand. There are a lot of behaviors that my parents have that I have learned to excuse 1) because I couldn't say shit, cuz....duh, they're my parents and 2) because I didn't realize that alot of parents are NOT like them. Of course, they share many characteristics of most parents, but there are these just...unexplainable traits of West Indian parents are are so rooted, I wouldn't even know where to begin to address some of them.

One thing that I've come to notice, and have heard from other friends with non-American parents, is the tyrant mindframe of our fathers. Again, this is something that I have just become very accustomed to, but it has begun to really boil my water and place a further gap between me and this man (my father). Granted, men in general, many cultures, are born and bred differently to be this all powerful, no nonsense, unquestionable forces that rule with an iron fist. But in the West Indian culture, what I notice also is such a lack of compromise, and lack of even trying to understand another point of view, ESPECIALLY if it's more "American/Yankee." But honestly, he is just so damn rude! No tact. Complete disregard for my feelings. Dismissive. Tyrannical. Critical.

I mean, love the man with my all, but sometimes...I just feel like he goes too far, and does this, because he knows he can, and has been allowed to do so by everyone in my family (my brother tries to go hard at him sometimes, tho, guess it's a guy thing). Things as personal as romantic relationships (he's only been privy to one, my most recent, which he was not a fan of, and had no problem informing me of this), he felt/feels the need to make inappropriate jokes and say hurtful things. Is this to gauge my true feelings? Is this to drive whatever point he has, home? Is this just for me to react?

And how bad is it that I've learned to just ignore him? In one, out the other. (or so it seems) That can't be healthy right? With family? The ease with which I brush his hurtful words off my shoulder? No, not healthy, but damn sure protective.


Do you have those people in your life who get under your skin, but for whatever reason, you never address it?
Just a thought.