February 14th, Whenever.

So this year I have a "Valentine." Not someone I chose to be my Valentine, or someone who asked me to be their Valentine. But someone, who by definition, has been labeled as such. This someone, being my wonderful, knuckle-headed, sweet and absolutely imperfect boyfriend.

So, what does February 14th, (tomorrow) mean to me? Not much. So, why are we not celebrating? Good question. A question that, while he is ecstatic that I'm fine not celebrating and is happy to know that no money shall be spent on this Hallmark Holiday, still makes him wonder, "What is wrong with this chick to not want to celebrate the day that was made specifically for her, and more specifically for her, when she's in a relationship? What did I do wrong?"

Awww, boo, you did nothing wrong. My problem, my issue, my concern, is with what this holiday represents and says to all who indulge, and those who don't indulge. I mean, the cliche way to approach this is to say that this holiday should be moot because romantic love should be celebrated EVERY day. Sure. That's fine. I get it. But why is something the matter when I've been "given" something that's always been a fad and wanted by eveyrone (unless you're on the Schizophrenic spectrum), and I'm just kickin it??

Here's why. Honestly, I don't celebrate romantic love everyday. Should I be? No doubt it's one of the most surreal experiences I've ever entertained in my life, and I'm grateful to have run into it at least once, but should it really always be celebrated? Because, in fact, this man pisses me off sometimes. He makes me mad, to the point where "love" is not the topic, and I'm spittin hot fire at his neck. Love, in and of itself, is tiring. It's takes time, energy, emotion, etc. It's not all gravy, it's not all nice, and while it's been my best life experience, it's also been my worst, and will indeed likely lead to some detriment in my life.

Now, I'm not saying that I don't love love. I wouldn't trade it, I promise you. And I'd go through all the shit I've already been through, to get to where I am in my journey to love. But...have we been putting love on too high of a pedestal? For those of us who have it, or had it, or long for it, or need it, or think they may have had it...the answer may be no. But what about those thousands and possibly millions of people that haven't had the chance? What does Valentine's Day say to them? "Awww, maybe next year you'll reach this quinessential peak of life..." That ain't even right...

I really don't know where I was going with this one...I'm just annoyed by the sea of read and pink I'm seeing all over the place, as well as sick of people asking people what I'm doing and where I'm going, then seeing their disgruntled and confused faces when I tell them that I'll be studying and playing PS2 with the boy.

Ah well. So much for the popular way to love.